The World is a Strange Place
by Ivy000
Summary: Randomness is a part of life. It's especially a part of writing, along with creativity and preserverance and all that sappy junk. So why is there no story devoted to life, liberty, and the pursuit of craziness? Well, now there is. Your favorite PoM characters dream and think in sometimes very strange ways. (Drabbles, Skilene)
1. Chapter 1

_**Hi, welcome to a world of no escape. Where dreams flow like water, and nothingness is everything. Where the deepest cobwebs of my mind spew out poisonous gases in the form of stories... Specifically PoM drabbles.**_

_** Welcome to dreamland. Wonderland, to be exact.**_

_**(Chapter summary-Skipper finds himself in Wonderland after falling asleep while Kowalski drones about science.)**_

I sit in a tree, lazily messing with my gun. Kowalski sits below me, reading a sciency book. I shoot the gun and knock a branch of the tree down.

"Skipper!" Kowalski reprimands me.

"What's the use of a book with no weapons, or warfare in it?"

Kowalski shakes his head and continues. I sigh and jump down from the tree before noticing Joey. This wouldn't have been that unusual except for the fact that he was holding a watch.

"Joey's late. He's late! Joey's very very late! No time to stay and punch, or kick! Joey's late he's late he's late!"

I decide to follow the strange kangaroo. He slips into a small hole in the ground. Shrugging, I follow him.

Before I know it, I'm falling down a very deep hole. Strangely, there are decorations and furniture on the walls! How queer! As I fall, I ponder the mysteries of the universe. Such as do otters beside Marlene eat popcorn?

"Do otters eat popcorn? Do otters eat popcorn? Doooooes popcorn eat otters?" For, as I had no way of answering these questions, it didn't really matter which way I put it.

After waking up, as I had fallen asleep, I found myself in a small room. After growing and shrinking and all sorts of things I found myself in a forest, with Zoë the ferret sitting in a tree above me with a huge grin on her face.

"Will you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"

"That depends on where you want to go."

I ponder this before replying.

"It doesn't really matter-"

"Then it doesn't matter where you go."

I'm getting a little annoyed at this point.

"As long as I get SOMEwhere."

"Oh, you're sure to do that," Zoë chuckled, "as long as you walk far enough,"

At this point I'm getting ticked off.

"Umm... What sort of people live around here?"

"In that direction is a Mad Dancer. And in that direction is a Maurician Lemur. Visit either. They're both mad."

"But I don't want to go among mad people."

"Oh, you can't help that. I'm mad. You're mad."

"How do you know that I'm mad?"

"You're a penguin that thinks he's a commando."

Growling, I move on. I'll visit the Dancer.

"Dance with my JJ! Shake my booty!"

I continue toward the Mad Dancer's house, getting seriously annoyed and wondering where I am.

"Oh, hello grumpy penguin!"

"Julien?" What is the ringtail doing here? Is this a dream?

Maurice sat next to the ringtail. He must be the Maurician Lemur. And Mort sits in a teapot. The doormouse, says some sort of voice in my brain. Weird. This seems a lot like Alice in Wonderland...

Mort starts singing some weird song.

"Twinkle twinkle little feet,

Cheesy Bits I love to eat,

Up below the sea of dreams,

Exit all reality,

Twinkle twinkle little feet,

Cheesy Bits are good to eat."

Okay, now I'm really confused. Julien leans down close to me.

"Why is my booty like heaven?" I groan and leave. If this is a dream, I really want to wake up!

Eventually I make it to some sort of palace. Dr. Blowhole sits on a throne, Private kneeling at his feet.

"Off with his head!" And Private is thrown into a cage with Rico and Marlene. I leap in, save the day and am dipping Marlene down for a kiss when...

"Skippa? What are you doing?" I wake up to find me dipping Private. I let him go and blush.

"Uhhh... Nothing. Go to bed." I climb into bed but am almost scared to dream.

_**So how'd you like that little slice of randomness? There's more to come, so review and follow for more drabbles and short stories! By the way, I am a Skilene fan. ;)**_

_**Riddle of the Day: Dear writers, what story can you never finish?**_


	2. Chapter 2

_**So, you have returned. Come crawling back from the pit of readers, searching desperately for a new story. I shall indulge you. Yes. Read. And, dare I say it? Review. Think of it this way: When I see a review, I want to to write. When I want to write, I publish a chapter. When a chapter gets published, I get reviews. It's a cycle. Keep it going.**_

_**Kowalski Proves his Smartness**_

Kowalski sat at his lab table, pouring chemicals and smiling maniacly.

"Baa baa black sheep have you any wool,

How I wonder what you are.

QRSTUVWXYZ

Twinkle twinkle little star

Yes sir yes sir three bags full."

Kowalski laughed again, giggling hysterically.

Yes!" He cried out in triumph. "Baa baa black sheep, Twinkle Twinkle, and the Alphabet Song all have the same tune! I'm a genius!"

A light shone upon his bubbling chemicals as Kowalski continued to act like a super villian. This lasted until-

"Kowalski? Are you in there?" Skipper stuck his head in the lab, giving Kowalski a strange look.

"We can't hear Shirtless Ninja Action Theater over your loud cackling."

"Oh. Sorry." Said Kowalski sheepishly.

Skipper shut the door. Kowalski resumed his cackling, but quieter.

**_It's pretty short, but oh well. Riddle:_**

**_You approach two talking doors. One door leads to the City of Truth, while the other door leads to the City of Liars. You do not know which door is which. You are able to ask only one question to determine which door is which. The door that leads to the City of Liars always speaks lies, while the door that leads to the City of Truth always speaks the truth. You want to go to the City of Truth. What question do you ask to determine which door leads to the City of Truth_**

**_Yeah. The doors can talk. Freaky huh? By the way, there are three answers._**


End file.
